I’m away for the next few days, having a holiday in the country and appearing as a guest star (of sorts) in a pub quiz. I was going to leave you with pithy thesis materials but instead I thought I might share with you the wonders of my phone’s peculiar and almost useless technology, word-predictive texting.

Most phones today have predictive texting; you start inputing a word and the phone tries to guess which word it is you want. My phone has an added feature; it will also try to predict the next word for you as well. This hardly ever works, but it does have a certain charm; if you let it predict one word it will quite happily try to predict the next word and so on until such time it completes a sentence or ends up repeating itself ad nauseam.

I often just start off a message to see where my phone will take it. Here are four of my favourites. I only chose the first word; the rest is all due to the ‘geniuses’ at Sony Ericsson.

This morning? Not convinced by the zombie apocalypse.

Rally to Wellington on the machine. Homeward bound.

Can book. Cool. You tried the other slot? Strange. Are we might also occupy and that’s a wrap, Mr. Cato.

You due to bother with my washing?

It’s not art but I know what I like.

See you on the other side of Easter.



admin says:

When asked where Devonport was my phone did say:

Devonport. That’s probably in Opunake.

This one is just weird and possibly rude:

When do you will. Just coming over Chinese it is then. Indeed.

(I think the ‘Indeed’ needs a ‘…’ before it to denote the realisation and shock the Phone had when it realised what it had just parsed.)

One more:

Can watch with the mall attached to the bed tonight.

Which makes perfect sense, really.

admin says:


Giovanni says:

If my cellphone had that function, I’d do nothing else.

(I have a very old phone. It has predictive texting, but it’s in cuneiform script.)

admin says:

My first phone only knew Sanskrit.