More Words of Wisdom from the Ivory Pagoda

“I’m going to blow my horn whilst slitting my own throat.”

“The deep dark secret of being a teacher is that it makes no real difference what you teach them. The deep dark secret of their being students is that they don’t believe you anyway.”

“My children will be born dead.”

“My children will be conceived dead.”

“We’re paid to teach; we’re not paid to make them learn.”

“It’s the lack of suitable genetic material that makes me rethink my position on marriage.”

“We should change the name of the Department to ‘Big Thinking.’ ‘Critical Thinking’ can become ‘Good Thinking,’ ‘Ethics’ can become ‘Happy Thinking,’ and that proposed subject ‘The Philosophy of Sport’ can be ‘Kicking around a few Thoughts.'”

“I’m your Venus, you’re my anus…”